


The Weight Of Life

by maxiemoo01



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Adoption, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Established Relationship, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Parenthood, Past Child Abuse, parent!phan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2019-01-06 10:40:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12209577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxiemoo01/pseuds/maxiemoo01
Summary: On his way home Dan comes across a teenage girl, who's stuck in the snow crying, and without a single thought Dan offers her a place to stay.





	1. One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo, so I can't just write one story at once, so I'm gonna start this and flip back and forth between compulsions, this, and one shots. So I hope you guys enjoy this! I just love the thought of Dan and Phil as dads honestly. As well as this chapter is probably quite shitty but I swear my writing isn't that bad (I hope not at least)

Dan watched his breath swirl in the air as he walked the familiar path. 

Dan had walked this path in his hometown many times, it was the path that lead to the nearest train station, the path he walked to go to London everyday for work experience, or to meet Phil. 

His parents had offered to drive him to the station since it was cold out and beginning to snow, but Dan didn't mind, he wanted to take a moment to let the memories sink in. 

They weren't all great memories though. 

Dan remembered walking the path, having to use what little money he had saved to get a train to Manchester to stay with Phil after his parents kicked him out.

He stayed in Phil's apartment until he could move into his dorm at university.

He remembered the feeling of nervousness as he walked the path to meet Phil for the first time. His parents not agreeing to him meeting up with some older guy from the internet.

So in the crisp October air he walked himself to meet Phil for the first time.

And now he was walking the path once again, to get on a train to London, to go back home to his amazing boyfriend. 

Dan hadn't been paying much attention during the walk but soon something did catch his attention.

It wasn't often you saw someone sitting on the sidewalk in the snow, sniffling, shoulders shaking with sobs, and a bag next to them. 

Dan slowly approached the girl, gently tapping her shoulder. "Excuse me?" 

Dan didn't talk to people often, he didn't talk to people willingly that often either, but this girl was no older then 12 and looked awful.

Her lips were turning a purple color from the cold, her hands were red from the cold, her nose was red and running but Dan could tell that wasn't just the cold. 

"Are you okay?" Dan asked softly. He always had a soft spot for kids, they were incredibly sweet and he had always wanted at least two kids of his own, even if him and Phil adopted. 

They had talked about adoption before, but they had decided they were too busy to care for a child at the moment. 

The girl quickly wiped her face and gave him a small smile. "Yes sir, I'm fine." Dan looked around for a moment before speaking again. 

"Are you lost? It's pretty cold out and you look like you've been out a while." The girl gently shook her head. 

"No no, I Uh... I just got kicked out is all... I decided to tell my family I was pan and they didn't take too kindly to it..."

Dan felt his chest sink, he couldn't imagine not having Phil to take him in when he was kicked out. 

"Do you have anywhere to stay?" Dan asked, moving to gently sit in the snow next to the girl. "I'm Dan, by the way."

"Beatrice, but you can just call me Bea... And Uh... No not really, most of my friends live in other towns and my family took my phone." Dan shifted. 

"Do you need to use mine? Do you have anyone you can call Bea?" Bea gently shook her head. 

"Not really, no." She said, looking down. 

Dan felt his heart shatter even more, this girl was out here, freezing, she was in shorts and a hoodie for god's sake and had on a pair of slippers. 

"I know I'm a bit of a stranger and you probably shouldn't trust me but Uh, I'm on my way to the train station, to head back to London, why don't you come with me? You can stay with me until we find you somewhere to go?" Dan suggested, his heart speeding up in his chest, Dan watched as the girl brushed her curly hair from her face before looking up at him. 

"I don't really have anything to lose then my life so I guess why not." Dan stood, letting out a chuckle and holding his hand out for her. 

"I'm not a murderer, I promise." Bea swung her bag over her shoulder then took his hand gently. 

"I never said that you were." She smirked and Dan chuckled as he started walking the path he knew all too well, trying to go fast as possible so that way he could get Bea somewhere warm, maybe he'd buy her a tea or coffee at the station, yeah that'd be a good idea. 

"So Bea, how old are you?" Dan asked, as he continued to speed walk and pull her behind him.

Dan didn't want to think right now about how upset Phil was probably gonna be with him for bringing a kid home, but Dan just couldn't stand the thought of leaving her alone.

"Well, lucky me just turned thirteen two days before Christmas." Dan nodded a bit, seeing the station come into view. "What about you Mr.stranger who's taking me home." Dan chuckled, slowing down as they got closer to the doors. 

"I turned 26 in June." Dan sighed as they made it into the building, which was quite warm. 

"Come on, let's get you something warm to drink for the ride alright?" Bea nodded softly and followed Dan around the station that he seemed to know quite well, Dan bought Bea some hot chocolate and himself a coffee before they headed off. 

Dan bought a last minute ticket for Bea and soon enough they were sat in a booth on the train.

Bea watched in amazement through the window and Dan smiled a bit at her, he assumed she had never been anywhere outside of wokingham before, which was understandable, most people from wokingham hadn't.

About half an hour into the hour train ride Dan looked at Bea and found her curled up on herself in the seat, hot chocolate held between her hands for warmth, sound asleep. 

Dan sighed softly, he already knew he had messed up picking up a kid, but now he had to call Phil, because he couldn't meet Phil at the station and tell him then, so he pulled his phone from his pocket and dialed Phil's number. 

Phil answered after a few minutes. "Hey! Don't tell me you got in early I haven't even left yet." Dan smiled at his boyfriends words, it was always nice to hear his voice. 

"No you dork I still have about half an hour." 

"Good! I'm excited to see you. I've missed you so much." Dan smiled wider at that. 

"I've missed you too Phil..." Dan sighed, looking at Bea. "But Uh, I have something I need to tell you about. And it's kind of important."

"Oh?" Phil asked, and Dan could hear him shifting about, probably sitting up straighter or moving to sit down to listen to what his boyfriend had to say. 

"Okay... First I need you to promise you won't get mad at me and you'll try to see this from my point of view?" Dan could hear even more shifting before Phil spoke. 

"Dan what did you do? I can't ever stay mad at you you know that but I'm not understanding what's going on... Did something happen with your family?"

"No no, everything was fine with them... I just... Did something that in hindsight is a little stupid but we're both gonna have to deal with the consequences." 

"Dan?"

"I'm getting to it, I'm getting to it..." He said, letting out a small sigh. "I decided I'd walk to the station, just for memories sake you know? And on my way I saw this girl, and she looked just barely older then twelve, she was crying, and her lips were purple, she had a bag by her side..." Dan looked at Bea, letting out another small sigh. 

"She was shaking so hard and I couldn't tell if it was from crying or the cold, she was in shorts for god's sake, and I stopped to talk to her because I couldn't just leave a crying kid on the side of the street who looked like she was gonna get hypothermia any second."

"Dan..." Dan ignored Phil, he knew if he didn't finish this he wouldn't be able to get the courage to finish before the train pulled into the station.

"So I talked to her, and she got kicked out by her family because she told them she was gay, just like me Phil, and she didn't have anywhere to go and I... She may or may not be asleep across from me in the booth of the train." There was silence from the other line, and Dan was getting worried. 

"Phil...?" He asked softly, not sure what to do, was he and at him? Upset he had done something so big without asking him first?

Then he heard Phil. "Dan we... We don't know how to raise a kid..." Dan smiled a bit. 

"I know... But it's not like she's three, I think we can handle a teenager better then a child you know?"

"I know Dan... How old is she?" Dan smiled more at Phil's words, glad that he didn't seem too upset. 

"She just turned thirteen... God Phil I would've been so scared, I couldn't leave her."

"I know." Phil said. "I don't think I would've been able to either. What's her name?"

"Bea." Dan looked at her sleeping figure, taking a moment to look at how she was curled up, she looked like all she wanted was to curl up so tight she disappeared. "She's sleeping just across from me, she's still shaking a bit." Dan could hear Phil's smile as he spoke. 

"Well, I better leave so I can be there before the train gets in to see you two. Then we'll head home and figure out some sleeping arrangements and such, yeah?" Dan smiled softly. 

"Yeah. I'll see you soon, love you."

"I love you too."

With that they hung up and Dan smiled softly, content with the thought that Phil was willing to do this with him, take care of a kid he picked up off the street. 

Dan couldn't wait to get back to London and see him, and take Bea to somewhere she could call home.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally updated what?? I hope you guys enjoy!

As the train began to slow to a stop Dan grabbed his things and gently shook Bea awake. She startled at first before she seemed to remember where she was a smile at Dan. 

"Come on, the trains pulling into the station." Bea nodded softly and stretched as she grabbed her bag, soon enough they were stepping off the train.

Dan was looking around for Phil and Bea looked at him strangely. "So where are we headed now?" She asked him softly, before Dan spotted Phil. 

"We're meeting up with my roommate, Phil, to head back to our apartment, I'll explain more when we get to the apartment." Dan lead her over to Phil and Phil grinned when he saw Dan and ran over, hugging him tightly. 

Dan was caught a bit off guard and laughed softly as he hugged Phil back. 

"I've missed you so much." Phil said, before pulling away and looking around to make sure no one was looking at them before he turned to Bea. 

"You must be Bea." Phil smiled at her, taking in her appearance, she was still in shorts, slippers and a red hoodie, and her curly brown hair was messy from having just woken up. 

"That would be me." She smiled, holding a hand out to him, which Phil shook before giving her a small hug. 

"Well, let's head back to the apartment so you can change into something more warm and we can work everything out." Dan nodded in agreement and they headed to grab a taxi home.

 Bea stayed quiet in the cab while Dan and Phil talked about their holidays.

"Oh, I have a few gifts from my family for you, you know how they are and all that." Dan chuckled softly, smiling. 

"You know how mine are, I have a gift for you from my grandma though, she's always loved you." Phil smiled. 

"Sometimes I wonder if she thinks I'm her grandkid as well." 

"Oh I'm sure she does, but that's a good thing trust me." Soon enough they made it to the apartment, Phil paid and they grabbed Dans bags and headed to their apartment. 

Once inside Bea looked around in amazement. 

"Wow." She said softly. "It's so nice and... Decorated..." Dan started to say something about that but decided against it. 

"Alright." Dan smiled. "Let me show you to the bathroom, I suggest a hot shower and some warm clothes but if you only wanna change clothes that's fine. Then we can discuss dinner and sleeping arrangements yeah?" Bea nodded softly so Dan showed her to their bathroom. 

"There are towels in that little cabinet right there. I'll leave you to it." Dan headed into the lounge and sat next to Phil. 

"So..." Dan said softly. 

Phil smiled at him. "She's very quiet." He said. "But she seems sweet." Dan nodded. 

"She is. I'm sorry I did something so major without telling you anything about it." Phil shook his head. 

"It's okay, I would've offered her somewhere to stay too." Phil shifted closer to Dan and Dan wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close. 

"I missed you..." He said softly. 

"I missed you too Dan... I just wish we could have Christmas here, and have both our families come so we don't have to separate." Dan chuckled softly. 

"You know my family wouldn't agree to that... But maybe once we get a house together we can set that up, you family can come, my grandma and brother could come, it'd be a nice little Christmas."Phil chuckled a bit. 

"I'd enjoy that." Phil sighed, cuddling closer to Dan. "So what are we doing here?" He asked. "We usually use your room so Bea can stay in mine I guess? But how are we gonna take care of her? We barely know how to take care of ourselves and we know nothing about how to care for a teenage girl." Dan sighed. 

"I don't know. I mean we could ask Louise? she has a little girl? Her girl may not be a teenager yet but you know... I'm sure she knows a bit about that kind of thing right?" Phil nodded. 

"Yeah... Why don't we call her tomorrow." Dan nodded this time. "And what about school?"

"I'm not so sure about that... Where is the closest school? And what would we need to do to get her enrolled? We aren't exactly legally her parents..."

"We'll figure it out... Alright?" Dan nodded, kissing Phil's head. 

"Right. We'll figure it out." Dan said softly. 

"So are you two dating?" Bea asked from the doorway, making Dan jump. 

"Jesus Christ you scared the shit out of me!" Dan exclaimed, resting a hand on his chest, before looking down at Phil. 

"I mean like, it's chill if you are you just only introduced him as your roommate."

"No no, Uh..." Dan shrugged. "There's no hiding it if you're living here so yeah, we're together..." Dan smiled a bit, even after all these years it felt nice to say that, he and Phil were together. 

"Neat." Bea chuckled, sitting down on the sofa across from the two who were still cuddled up together. 

Phil shifted a bit to sit up straighter before speaking. "So Bea, why don't you tell us a bit about yourself?"

 Bea shifted, running a hand through her slightly wet hair. "Well there's not much to me... I just turned thirteen, I'm gay, I got kicked out by my parents, literally what, three hours ago? I've never really had many friends, I was homeschooled so that limited my social interaction... I'm just a very awkward and clumsy person." Bea shifted, looking down at her hands. 

"Well, you aren't alone in that. Me and Phil are probably the most awkward and clumsy people you will ever meet, you'll fit right in seriously." Dan chuckled a bit. 

 Bea smiled softly at that, before looking down, she was now in a pair if mismatched socks and seemed most intrested in them at the moment, before speaking up a few minutes later. "I'll be out of you guys hair soon, I promise I won't stay long."

Dan froze, looking at Phil for a moment before looking back to Bea. "Come over here and sit down Bea." He said softly, watching as she slowly walked over and sat across from them on the sofa. 

She put her hands in her lap, staring down at them before finally looking up to Dan. "We want you to stay with us, we don't care how long you're here, we're gonna help you, take care of you, I promise." Bea looked back to her lap. 

"You won't soon, everyone eventually gets tired of me." Dan sighed softly. 

"We won't, I swear to you." He reached out, gently taking her hand. "I swear, we're gonna take care of you, and make sure you have everything you need."

Bea slowly looked up at Dan, taking in the moment and sincerity in his eyes before slowly nodding. "Okay... Thank you."

After some short chat to get to know Bea, they ordered take away and watched a movie.

The boys let Bea choose and she choose rise of the guardians, claiming that, while its a child's movie, its still pretty great. 

They let Bea take Phil's room once the movie ended and it was getting late, telling her to make herself at home, before they themselves headed to bed. 

As Dan curled up next to Phil in bed, watching as he put his glasses on the night stand, he began to think.

He wasn't sure how great of an idea it was to bring Bea in, he could've called child services, or done something else, but instead he brought her home. 

Phil insisted he wasn't upset but was that really true? 

Phil settled down next to Dan, pulling him closer. "What's on your mind? I know that thinking face." He began to run his hands through Dan's curls, letting Dan sigh and lean into his hand before answering.

 "Are you mad at me? Because I'd be mad at me if I were you." Phil let out a small sigh, letting his fingers massage Dan's head. 

"I'm not mad at you Dan, I promise. Don't think yourself like that, I'd tell you if I was okay?" Dan nodded softly. 

"Okay..." Phil pulled Dan closer to his chest, smiling as the younger curled into him. 

"Let's get some rest." Dan nodded against his chest, eyes already beginning to close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I'm max and I don't know how trains work???? Lemme know if you guys spot any typos or mistakes!
> 
> Tumblr: heartsponge


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who takes forever to write chapters (me, its me)

Dan wasn't usually first awake, even with his current sleeping schedule where he tried to go to bed earlier, Phil was usually awake before him. 

Not today however. 

Dan woke up much earlier then usual, which was odd but Dan had learned not to really question his body, so instead he quietly slipped out of bed and headed to the lounge.

When He stepped into the lounge he noticed Bea, curled into the corner of the sofa holding a book which she seemed to be reading intently. Dan took notice of her appearance for a moment. 

Her hair was long and curly, it was black and fell over her shoulders nicely, her skin was slightly tanned, with dark circles under her eyes which seemed to be hooded with sleep, and her eyes were a light brown, it reminded Dan of caramel in a way. He chuckled quietly to himself at that thought, remembering Phil saying something similar to him. 

When Bea heard the noise she jumped, slamming her book closed and seeming to hide it. "D-Dan." She said, taking a deep breath and pressing a hand to her chest. "Geez, you're gonna give me a heart attack.."

Dan gave her a fond smile. "Sorry, my bad." He ran a hand through his curls, attempting to fix them somewhat. "What are you doing up so early?" Bea looked down, playing with her sleep pants as she answered. 

"Oh, I'm just um... I'm a morning person." Dan raised an eyebrow to that, looking at her facial features for a moment before responding, voice soft. 

"Did you sleep at all Bea?" Bea looked up at him, letting out a small sigh, picking up her book and holding it close to her chest as she spoke. 

"No... I didn't actually." Dan gave her a small smile, walking over and sitting next to her. 

"Thats okay, I take it its odd to be somewhere other then home yeah?" Bea nodded a bit. "Well, if you sleep now you'll just mess with your sleep schedule, so would you like some coffee?" Bea nodded.

"Coffee would be nice, if that's okay." Dan patted her leg gently before standing. 

"Its fine, I was just going to make some of my own. Why dont you come keep me company and tell me about that book of yours?" Bea looked down at the book in her hands, shaking her head gently. 

"Its really not that interesting... Its kind of dumb to be honest." Dan waved his hand, shaking his head as he did. 

"Nonsense, you looked pretty into it, I'm sure its interesting." Bea gave him a small smile as he stood and held his hand out for her. 

She took it, standing slowly. "It really is but... I guess I could tell you about it." Dan gave her a reassuring smile and headed to the kitchen, grabbing the kettle and filling it up with water. 

"So first off, what's the name of it?" Bea pulled herself up onto the counter, sitting on it as she spoke. 

"Its called Fangirl." She looked down at the book again, resting it on her legs. Dan decided to look at the cover and smiled a bit. 

"Very aesthetic." Bea let out a small chuckle and nodded. 

"Yeah. Its about this girl, her names Cath, her twin sister and her are starting college, her sister decided she was gonna be social and didn't want to share a dorm with her, but Cath has bad social aniexty, so she doesn't want that. Its about her trying to get through her first semester without her sister to help her, she also writes fanfiction, which is a big part of the story, its why its called fangirl, and- sorry... I um... I just really like this book."

Dan looked at her, smiling fondly. "Don't apologize, its obviously means something to you. It sounds really good, maybe I'll have to read it one day." Dan watched the way Beas eyes lit up at that. 

"Really? You wanna read it?" She asked, and Dan's heart sunk as he noticed that look, a look he's sure Phil's seen from him many times. 

Someone actually listening to you, taking interest in something you like when no one did before. 

No ones ever listened to Bea, or taken intrest in her interests. 

"Of course, it sounds interesting to me, and you obviously like it so maybe I will."

The way Bea's smile widened and her face lit up, it made Dan feel good, he made this girl happy by simply saying he wanted to read something she enjoyed. 

It was a great feeling to see her happy.

* * *

 They ended up sitting together on the sofa, talking about the things they enjoy as they sipped their coffee.

Eventually they had put a movie on, and about thirty minutes in Dan looked over to mention something to Bea and saw her curled up, sound asleep.

He smiled softly at her, turning the movie off before standing, he grabbed a blanket from a closet in the hall, gently laying it over her before he headed to the kitchen.

Dan leaned against the counter as he waited for the kettle to boil so he could make Phil coffee.

He took his time to think as he waited, this whole thing was so strange, he didn't know how to take care of a kid, he's always wanted kids, he and Phil had talked on a few occasions about children but neither of them felt like they were anywhere near ready for it.

Dan sighed softly to himself as he got a mug down, filling it with the water and starting to make Phil's coffee.

They could make this work, he thought to himself, they _would_ make this work, and like he said in some liveshow a few years ago, he would be the best parent that ever existed.

So with a newfound confidence he grabbed Phils mug and headed to their bedroom.

Dan smiled at Phil in the bed, he always looked just a bit older when he slept, but Dan enjoyed that.

He walked over, sitting the mug on the nightstand, he sat gently beside Phil, running his fingers through his hair. "Hey." Dan said. "Its time to get up, Phil." He smiled as Phil sleepily blinked his eyes open. 

"You're up early..." Phil muttered, rubbing his eyes as he sat up, stretching and yawning. 

"I made you coffee." Dan said, grabbing the mug and passing it to Phil after he got situated. 

"Thanks." Phil wrapped his hands around his mug, sipping lightly at it. "Why are you up so early?" Phil asked, raising an eyebrow.  Dan shrugged. 

"Just woke up early, couldn't go back to sleep." Phil nodded, glancing at the clock. 

"Is Bea awake?" Phil asked, voice soft as he sipped his coffee. Dan smiled a bit, shaking his head. 

"No, she's pretty tuckered out." Phil nodded.

"I'd think so, she had a pretty big day yesterday it seems." 

"Yeah... She's such a sweet kid Phil..." Phil gave Dan a small smile. 

"I know..."

"I can't stand to think about what she's gone through, Phil she just seems so... Hurt. I just wanna protect her. Keep her safe from all the shit in the world." Dan sighed, looking up at the ceiling. 

"You know that's impossible Dan." Phil said, gently sitting his cup down, reaching over and taking Dan's hand in his. "You can't protect her from what's already happened, and we sure as hell can't protect her from the world." Phil smiled. "But we can do what we can, keep her safe, give her somewhere to be herself."

Dan squeezed Phil's hand. "As long as she's here she'll be able to be herself. No matter what." 

Phil nodded in agreement. "Now that we've been all mushy, breakfast?" Dan chuckled, nodding. 

"Breakfast."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tumblr: Heartsponge


End file.
